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Game shooting needs to be more corporate

Music and paraphernalia such as foam hands and inflatable batons are increasingly being used in professional sport to ‘add colour and atmosphere’ to the sporting experience. While some traditionalists in rugby and football – have decried its use as ruining their day out – especially their feeling of elation when their team scores, it is nevertheless ubiquitous.
Game shooting says that it is inclusive and embraces change, so to prove this to those outside the sport of game shooting the following steps must be taken to enlighten shoot days – the theme tune to The Professionals, The Sweeny or Thunderbirds must be played over loud speakers when the guns take to the field. Drives will begin and end with the opening bars to Beethoven’s Symphony No.5. Beaters must play vuvuzelas instead of making noise with sticks. Each individual gun game shooting will be allotted a member of the local primary school cheerleading team to encourage them to shoot well and will hold up a placard reading HIT when they take a bird cleanly. Shoots must meet the cost of materials and personnel hire, so are encouraged to sell the naming rights to their drives and emblazon their estate tweeds with the names of corporate sponsors. Game shooting can only benefit from this razzamatazz!

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